Never push her head down and for heaven’s sake hold still and let her control the motions.”Īnother woman responded to a similar concern, saying: “Work with your boyfriend to find something else that is as pleasurable (or more) for BOTH you and him that doesn’t cause you pain. Try sitting on the edge of the bed with her kneeling before you so that she is not tipping her head back as much. In the meantime, you can try different positions to reduce the stress on her jaw, neck, (and) facial muscles. Quite frankly, you may have to learn to live without having her perform oral on you. When I am having a rough time with it, my jaw will often lock up or dislocate itself as the swelling will push it out of place. I have TMJ also and it is very painful at times. You will note that, in every case where successful solutions were found, mutual concern, experimentation, flexibility, communication and compromise were essential elements for these couples.įor example, after someone expressed concern that his girlfriend could not perform oral sex on him because of her TMJ, a woman responded: “Poor gal. If concerns were serious, fears of pain too anxiety provoking, or if relationships became distant, sexual activity may have ceased altogether.Ī number of people described very specific solutions that they and their partners found helpful. At times, pain medications or other medical treatments affected level of energy or sexual interest. Other women reported being clinically depressed, which can have its own impact on sexual interest or performance. Some people experienced pain of a more general nature, so that vaginal intercourse or other types of touch were uncomfortable as well. Some people mentioned that they were not able to get help from health professionals or were even reluctant to bring up the issue with them out of embarrassment, especially if their physician or dentist was an older man. For example, a partner may assume that his wife or girlfriend is having an affair or that she is just using her TMJ problem as an excuse for not performing oral sex.
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In many cases, partners were very supportive and patient, while in others, relationships were adversely affected by these problems. Opening one’s mouth wide during orgasm was also mentioned as a problem. Oral sex or kissing might also cause jaw popping which, at the very least, was embarrassing and might break the mood of intimacy. Most of the concerns were from women and were about pain experienced during oral stimulation of their partner’s penis, especially if it was prolonged or if penetration was deep. In a number of online discussions, people with TMJ disorders have mentioned problems in a number of intimate activities, including open mouth kissing, oral sex, orgasm, intense intercourse, and even having conversations with a partner.